FEEL it, MOVE it, RELEASE it, heal it...

Every Monday I share an intuitive message with my email community. This week’s message was about ANGER.

Anger’s not an emotion I’m particularly comfortable feeling? 

You?

As a kid, everyone tries to make you feel something different when anger comes to the surface. I don’t ever remember being held in my anger or feeling safe enough to really express it, do you?

Nobody ever said to little Heather or to grown Heather for that matter, 

“I know you’re really angry right now and that’s OK!”

As a parent, TOTALLY FREAKIN GUILTY of this!!!!  And honestly I didn’t even realize it, not consciously. Not until our family therapist said, “Your kid is angry, that’s OK, do you think you can just allow that feeling and hold safe space for them?”

MIND-BLOWN!!!

Inside, little Heather was screaming, “yes, yes, yes let them FEEL the anger!!!”

I took a deep breath and felt myself in my body and answered, “Yes, I can do that.”

Then the other night this happened…

My daughter came downstairs in a tizzy. She was making stickers for a friend. She was trying to get a clear piece of electrical tape and couldn’t find the place to start pulling up the tape on the roll. We’ve all been there and it can be REALLY frustrating.

She tried for a very long time before asking for my help. I realized she was picking at the wrong place. I was able to get it started fairly easy. This infuriated her even more. I get it. Ya try to do something simple for a long time, finally ask for help and BAM the other person does it with no problem. GRRRRRRR!

Then she tried to put something away and in her rage jammed her finger. OUCH! I could feel her intense emotions in my body, though I wasn’t sure if she needed to cry or what. So I asked…

“You ok? I’m sure that was really frustrating. Do you need to cry?”

“NO I’m ANGRY,” she glared at me.

My response since becoming aware of allowing anger and holding space for it:

“That’s Ok, go be angry! Let yourself FEEL it. Go upstairs scream into a pillow, kick the crap outta your stuffed animals and punch your mattress. Then breathe. And if you’re still feeling angry do it some more.”

She looked at me a bit perturbed. 

“Look, babe as women we’re taught not to feel or display signs of anger. Just like I tell your brother it’s ok and important to cry, it’s ok and important to feel and move through anger. Go for it. I’ll be down here when you need me.”

As sounds of anger echoed through the floor all I could do was smile.

Then I thought, “That was great advice, I need to hold that space for myself and my anger. I need to kick and scream and punch and move anger through me.” 

She came back down, took a swig of her drink, let out a breath and just stared at me. I opened my arms and she fell safely in. I kissed her on the crown of her head and told her I was really proud of her for FEELING and moving that anger.

It’s amazing how much we can learn from our children AND how beautifully we can re-parent ourselves when we leave shame and judgement behind. Awareness is the key!

ALL parents feel their kids emotions to some degree, if you’re a highly sensitive empathic parent like me you feel it on an extremely deep level. It can be really hard not to soak in and FEEL EVERYTHING your kid is feeling. That can be overwhelming and intense. So naturally when anger and other heavy emotions rise you want to shift the energy quickly. Instead PAUSE, BREATHE and remember that emotions are energy in motion and the only way to heal is to feel and move that energy through the body! You got this! And if you need support, email me!!!

In those moments when tensions are high and you’re soaking it all in, remind yourself that it’s not your emotion, the energy doesn’t belong to you, it’s your kids. Feel your feet on the ground. Breathe in and out with the intention of releasing the energy you’ve taken on from your child on the exhale. And remember that you’re kids are watching you and waiting for cues on how to deal with their emotions.

Anger: my own, my husband’s, my kid’s, the world’s…it’s palpable right now. So when I tapped into spirit and my intuition for this week’s wisdom about ANGER a simple yet incredibly potent message came through…

Feel it - Move it - Release it- Heal it

When anger rises, what does it feel like in your body, where do you feel it in your body? What other emotions are underneath that anger? Maybe you wanna journal about it and see what comes up, go for it!

Stay safe, please don’t hurt others AND DO find ways to MOVE that energy through your body.

Here are a few ways to move the anger through your body:

-scream 

-kick a stuffed animal or something soft

-punch a pillow

-work with clay -mash it /slam it 

-run, walk, hike or bike

-throw stones into the water 

-blast music and shake your body

Please remember you are NOT the emotion. You’re a human being experiencing energy. That energy wants and needs to move through you. You get to choose how to move it. Allow yourself to let it go and release it. And if you need support, don’t be afraid to ask for help!

Do you allow yourself to feel the heavier emotions like anger? How do you move it through your body? Please share in the comments, it could help another soul on the journey. Not sure how to BE with your emotions? Need support? Email me divinelysensitive@gmail.com and I will personally write you back with some simple practices to support you.

Wanna receive messages, medicine and wisdom in your inbox weekly? Click this LINK and receive a free guided meditation designed to help calm your nervous system in less than 10 minutes. Once you’re part of my email community, you wont miss any of the magic brewing at Divinely Sensitive.

With love + sensitivity, 

Heather xo

PS - I started a brand new podcast to help you harness the power of your intuition. This can come in very handy while learning to FEEL, MOVE, RELEASE and HEAL emotions. Check out the first few episodes HERE.